Dave Ramsey says: Agreed upon, in writing and temporary

A listener of The Dave Ramsey Show asks if she, her husband and new baby should temporarily move in with her mother-in-law while they try to pay off their $60,000 in debt.

BY DAVE RAMSEY

Aug 11, 2026, 3:01 PM

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Dear Dave,

My husband and I have our $1,000 beginner emergency fund in the bank, and we’re about to start paying off debt. Currently, I’m a stay-at-home mom taking care of our new baby. My husband brings home about $3,000 a month, and we have $60,000 in student loan and credit card debt. My mother-in-law said we could move in with her for a while, in order to make it easier to save money, pay off debt and save up to buy a house. Do you think we should accept her offer?

Emma

If you agree to move in it needs be temporary and in writing

Dear Emma,

Don’t get me wrong. Your mother-in-law’s offer is a sweet and generous gesture. But I’d prefer that you guys maintain your own residence, if your husband can get his income up.

Moving in with a parent would be my last choice in a situation like this, if for no other reason than keeping your independence and dignity. Plus, I think it would just be better for your marriage all the way around. But here’s the big thing. You two don’t need to even think about buying a house until you’ve completely cleaned up the financial mess you’ve made.

I understand money can get tight when you don’t have a lot coming in. Add a new baby to the mix, and things can get a little scary and stressful. So, if things are so tight you feel like you have to take your mother-in-law up on her offer, I’d recommend staying with her for a limited amount of time.

I’d also advise writing the entire agreement down on paper. Maybe for six months, but definitely no more than a year. During this time, you and your husband need to get on a serious, no nonsense budget, knock out a bunch of debt and pile up as much cash in savings as possible. Then, find yourselves a clean, reasonably priced place to rent in a safe area for a while. Hopefully, by that time you two will have found a way to increase his income.

But the big thing is to get stuff straight in your mind about this situation. Make sure everyone involved knows the arrangement is temporary, and that you and your husband are serious about doing the hard work it’ll take to put your financial house in order.

A helping hand is one thing. But your family shouldn’t still be living with a parent two or three years down the road!

— Dave