ARIZONA MOM

Not to be judgy, but why must we judge?

Jul 16, 2014, 7:06 PM | Updated: 7:06 pm

I was at my daughter’s soccer game watching her gleefully score a goal for the opposing team when I heard a mom say to her husband, “Oh, don’t forget we need more bento boxes for the kids’ lunches.”

Come again? Bento boxes? My daughter ate a spotted banana on the way here. I immediately began one of my least favorite habits — judging other moms.

You see it every day, everywhere. Seeing a kid with out-of-control uncombed hair — judge the mom. Facebook status updates about the benefits of co-sleeping — judge the mom. Watching a kid freak out like a wild hyena in the grocery store — judge the mom.

We are hard enough on ourselves, being hard on each other is not helping anyone.

Raising children can be a truly terrifying job. If some people mess up at their job, they get written up or have a sit down with their boss. If we screw up, we potentially screw up human beings.

The gravity of being a parent is staggering. The constant self-doubt, second-guessing everything from letting them watch “Sponge Bob” to worrying about the hormones in chicken to the fact that I don’t always buy organic vegetables.

Every night I go to sleep with all of these things bouncing around in my head. The fear that you are in charge of the fate of these little beings and you could very well be “doing it wrong” is paralyzing.

So go from that mindset to hearing about bento boxes. Then I feel badly that I have never once fed my children at RA Sushi. Should I be exposing them to more exotic foods? Is this going to lead to unhealthy habits later in life and they end up on “Maury Povich” talking about how they wished their mom would have given them more sashimi in their formative years?

As I sat and thought about all of these possibilities, I decided that instead of rolling my eyes and letting my insecurities take over, I would take my daughter to sushi after her game.

We sat down and discussed how proud I was of her for scoring a goal, regardless of it being in the wrong net. Being that a sushi restaurant was a big departure from the norm, I went over the menu options, including bento boxes.

When the server came over to get our order my daughter looked up at her and innocently said, “I’ll have the chicken nuggets.”

Charlotte was the winner of KTAR’s Mother of All Contests promotion. She won an iPad, professional family photos and her own blog on KTAR.com for a year.

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Not to be judgy, but why must we judge?