5 reasons why Rodman’s visit to North Korea is a good thing
Sep 5, 2013, 5:33 PM | Updated: 5:33 pm
The world is going to hell is a hand basket. Syrian President Bashar al-Assad has allegedly gassed over 1,400 of his people, Miley Cyrus has forever defiled the symbolism of the foam finger and we have learned that Senator John McCain would rather play poker on his iPhone than deal with the world’s pressing problems.
But then I woke up Tuesday to some good news. Apparently, Dennis Rodman had such a goodtime during his March visit to North Korea that he has returned to visit his buddy Kim Jong-un.
I know a lot of people in the media are blasting Rodman’s decision to visit the “communist” leader and his starving country, but seriously, there are many benefits to a Rodman visit to North Korea. So, let’s keep an open mind before passing judgment on the former NBA star.
Here are five reasons why Rodman’s visit is a good thing:
1. Because it went so well the last time.
2. Rodman can finally speak with someone who understands his unintelligible, inaudible dialect and who also speaks the same language…crazy.
3. Kim Jong-un finally has someone who can pick him up and help him reach the basket.
4. Rodman will bring some of his leftover red hair dye to help explain to Kim Jong-un what a “red” line is, just in case Obama issues him one.
5. Kim Jong-un wants to know what twerking is and needs helps with the new sorority recruits at NKNWDU, or North Korea Nuclear Weapons Development University.
If these reasons aren’t enough, Rodman has explained the rational for his visit. “I’ve come out here to see my friend. I want to talk about basketball.” He also added, “I love him – the guy’s awesome.”
So, let’s all take a deep breath and let Rodman develop this unlikely friendship between the world’s craziest tyrant and the world’s craziest freak show. Who knows, perhaps Rodman will actually come back with Korean-American Christian missionary Kenneth Bae. Then we would all look pretty stupid.