Ice scream

All right, so I’m watching TV news from all over the world, and you know the one story I hear repetitively from almost everywhere? How lousy the weather is.

The East Coast and Midwest blanketed with snow and ice — up to 17 inches in Maine alone. The south is freezing. And that’s just the U.S.

This past weekend, there was a blizzard in Jerusalem. I mean, that’s messing with the Old Testament. If I were in Venice, I’d have frost on my gondola.

For all of you who say you miss having all four seasons, try to bring yourself to remember that winter is one of them. Some of you nostalgically recall the beauty of moonlight on the newly fallen virgin snow. For some reason, a lot of you have forgotten the virgin slush immediately followed by virgin black ice, a Christmas gift to tow truck drivers.

So, Phoenix, how’s the weather? Oh, mid-70s to low-80s. And if relatives from Chicago are calling, try to hide that smug sound to your voice.

Yes, it gets hot in the summer, but thank God you don’t have to shovel it!

I’m Pat McMahon.

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