THE LASSO

Humankind lives to see another sunrise in movies for Earth Day

Apr 22, 2017, 5:00 AM

(Pixabay.com Photo)...

(Pixabay.com Photo)

(Pixabay.com Photo)

For 47 years, humanity has celebrated Earth Day, a proactive push to get us to keep the planet thriving.

This Earth Day seemed like a good time to think of some of the best movies where the planet is threatened, but not by our own hands. Yay!

‘Independence Day’

This was one great movie, full of nail biting, cheering and shockers for the audience. The 1996 hit starred Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum and Bill Pullman figuring out how to fight a space-alien invasion.

And fight they did.

‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’

For your own safety, do not mess with Gort. In this 1951 classic, helpful but judgy alien Klaatu arrives on Earth to warn humans that they’re wrecking everything with all the warring, so calm down before the rest of the galaxy does something permanent about it.

Welp, he gets shot by a U.S. soldier, which is a fine how do you do, and ol’ Gort the robot lasers them. So, that was a big surprise to the nonpitchfork-carrying townfolk.

Klaatu still does his best to keep the planet revolving. Bless his heart. Or whatever an alien has.

‘War of the Worlds’

The first time H.G. Wells’ “War of the Worlds” made a media appearance, the fake invasion of New Jersey by Martians scared the socks off America on radio in 1938.

That was nothing compared to the 2005 thriller starring Tom Cruise and directed by Steven Spielberg, who made lightning evil.

Tom Cruise tries to get his kids out of town when lightning strikes turn out to be aliens/machines with a penchant for obliterating people. Not cool, visitors. Not cool.

‘Armageddon’

When an asteroid is hearing straight for Earth, it makes complete sense to gather up a ragtag crew to launch into orbit to stop it. And that idea is even better when Ben Affleck, Steve Buscemi and Bruce Willis are among the misfits.

A destructive meteor shower starts plunking Earth, and eventually a really big piece is going to vaporize us all.

OK, time for said misfits to get moving. All they have to do is rocket up there, find the asteroid — how hard can that be, right? — deliver and detonate a bomb to break up the asteroid. They’ve got a whole month to do it. Oh, and possibly none of them will make it home. We owe you, guys.

At least they will not have to hear Steven Tyler’s “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” for the megabillionth time since 1998.

‘Deep Impact’

A 7-milelong comet is going to destroy Earth. In 1998. But this is different from “Armageddon.” Totally different. For one thing, Morgan Freeman is president of the United States, If that voice tells you everything is going to be all right, then it will be.

Anyway, let’s send a crew with a nuclear bomb to stop it or at the very least divert it. Things don’t go as planned, what with it being a disaster movie and all.

The Lasso

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Humankind lives to see another sunrise in movies for Earth Day