How can I be a good parent? Here are tips from the experts

Has the question “how can I be a good parent” ever crossed your mind? There is not one easy answer to this question, but a few parenting experts have a some suggestions for you.

According to the parenting expert Alfie Kohn, we have to be a working-with parent. It is finding balance with your wishes and your child’s wants. Sometimes we have to let go just a little and not be so controlling. This will take time and practice, but it’s OK. Messing up every once in a while will not put your children on to the path of failure.

The book, “Positive Discipline” by professional Jane Nelsen, suggests being kind and firm to your children. Now, you don’t often hear those words in a sentence together, but hear me out. When you are kind to them, it builds a strong loving relationship. When we are firm and consistent with our children, it helps them know what you expect, and they can understand what will happen in the future. We need them both to help our children understand that we love them even when we are disciplining them.

Jim Fay and Foster W. Cline, founders of Parenting with Love and Logic, suggests becoming a consultant parent. You can do this by drawing and holding limits for your children. Encouraging your child to think about his behavior and how it affects others as well as themselves. A consultant parent also gives choices within limits. It helps the child feel like she has some control over the situation and isn't being told what to do.

John Gottman, the expert and author of “Emotion Coaching” suggests we put ourselves into our children’s shoes and show empathy. We truly need to understand what is going on if we want to parent them. We have to get down to the bottom of things so we know what the real problem is. It might not be easy at first but by continuing to try it, it will only get easier. Here are some other parenting tips to consider.

When it comes to parenting, practice does not make perfect. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. We all make mistakes but can learn from them. Remember every child is different, so there isn’t a right answer. Hopefully this can help you become better and succeed in the future.