JIM SHARPE

Gun shamers, go out and get yourselves a hobby

May 18, 2016, 12:25 PM | Updated: 3:15 pm

(AP Photo/Lisa Marie Pane)...

(AP Photo/Lisa Marie Pane)

(AP Photo/Lisa Marie Pane)

Gov. Doug Ducey signed a bill into law Tuesday that allows retired law enforcement officers to carry their guns into bars and restaurants that serve alcohol.

The mayhem! The murder! The out-of-control, trigger-happy, let’s-not-forget-drunk cowboys!

Horse-puckey.

House Bill 2030 allows “…an honorably retired law enforcement officer who has been issued a certificate of firearms proficiency by the Department of Public Safety (DPS) to carry a weapon on the licensed premises of an on-sale retailer…” minus a concealed weapon permit.

Why did I say “minus a concealed weapon permit?”

Because law-enforcement officers, retired law enforcement officers, or just good ol’ plain citizens with a concealed weapons permit can already carry a concealed firearm into a place that serves liquor – as long as the bar or restaurant doesn’t have the properly placed (and designed) “no firearms allowed pursuant to A.R.S. section 4-229” sign.

People who were against the bill want you to think that things are going to really go haywire.

(Insert eye-roll emoji here.) Of course, that’s ridiculous.

First, the new law doesn’t allow anyone to carry a firearm while actually consuming the adult beverage of their choice, with one exception: “…if an undercover peace officer consumes small amounts of liquor while on assignment…”

Second, there are already people carrying concealed weapons into bars and restaurants. Some of them legally, some of them illegally. Wouldn’t you like to have someone who has been trained in how to use deadly force and how to calm down potentially violent situations also carrying a gun?

Third, the same run-away-with-your-arms-flailing-in-the-air attitude toward guns was displayed a few years ago after Arizona passed the law that let citizens carry a concealed weapon without a permit. Incidentally, it’s the same law that allows permit holders to enter liquor-serving establishments.

We were told how there was going to be shootouts in the street. Cue the tumbleweed crossing the street and the theme to “The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.”

The “all guns are evil” gang wants you to believe that we are headed back to the wild, wild west of the 1880s, while the truth of the matter is the Phoenix metro area has not seen this low a murder rate since the 1980s.

This is all very exhausting. My dad says that, when one is dealing with high-strung, overly-emotional people, resorting to logic is admitting defeat, and I’m getting really bored beating back lame arguments.

It might be easier for me (and my psyche) to begin offering free tuition to the anti-gun Chicken Littles. Free needlepoint classes might just do it. I hear it can be quite relaxing.

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Gun shamers, go out and get yourselves a hobby